Happy Bloomin Christmas

Raymond Briggs' "Father Christmas" was always by far my favorite Christmas book...pshhh to the Polar Express...I love the grump town Santa! Shows the kids the real work Santa does for us...

photo credit

Merry Christmas everyone, especially the Jews!

xo

On a Bacon Kick or Kick Me out of Bed Bacon

Santa please get your hands on this prototype for me. Thanks, love you!

If you can't tell...thats a pig shaped alarm clock that wakes you up to a freshly cooked piece of bacon. Yum. More info on the WakeNbacon.

Its a Bacon Kind of Day (well yesterday really)

Yesterday my roommate got a bacon tuxedo* for Christmas.

*actually a joke box, but I would have loved to see him in a suit made of meat

I also had a very lengthy discussion about Baconnaise...not brought up by me might I add. I have yet to try this stuff, but I might skip it after reading Bacon is My Lover's account with it.

And then I received a bacon inspired board game for my birthday. Mr. Bacon looks happy...I want to eat him and his whole family...and then eat the game...and maybe their pet dog...hot dog...mmm corn dog...

In the immortal words of King Curtis

Thursday is FREE ass Shipping Day!!!

For any of you who have yet to get all their Christmas shopping done, over 700 online stores are offering FREE bitch ass* shipping on Thursday Dec. 17th (tomrrow!!!) with delivery confirmed by Christmas Eve. If only I had procrastinated a little more I would be fully using these services....

Check out participating retailers Free Shipping Day

Thanks recession, you did it again!

*added for dramatic purposes...by no means are these companies claiming to be bitch asses

Santa's face not covered as I don't want to make it on the NAUGHTY list because he thinks I think he's a cheap ass bitch...mama needs some new socks...I mean camera...I mean trip to anywhere...
Also picture is from the cheap ass archives of my life.

xo,
Purple Monkey Bandit

Amazing Packages in the Mail!

Not only am I receiving all the etsy Christmas gifts I purchased in the mail....but the other day a very special gift came for me...and it was FREE.

Never say you don't win anything on the internet, because just the other day I won an amazing giveaway by an ever talented blogger and Etsy entrepreneur that I have been following for some time. Her products are amazing and I can't wait to show off my new goods....however another certain blogger is receiving the same thing from me for Christmas...so you will just have to be patient until then.

"There's No Gift like the Present and There's No Present like 'Stingray Sam'"

Stingray Sam, an episodic musical space western, I has the pleasure of working on is offering the first two episodes for download for FREE on their website. Take that Hulu! The director, Cory McAbee, is one of the most creative inspiring people I have had the chance to work with...so watch enjoy and get addicted to Stingray!

Watch the Trailer Below.



I did get my hands on a copy the other day and an very excited to show it to the whole family over christmas time. My dad is probably just going to be confused the whole time, but I can't wait!

My life is Bananas

Last year I almost quit a job over bananas, $17 worth of bananas to be exact. It was a dumb miscommunication at work that resulted in numerous phone calls on my day off that led to me getting frustrated and pissed off. Being a personal assistant to some rich people can be exhausting....rich people are rich cause they count every dollar, and that includes an order for bananas (also the last time I did a favor for their cook). After all the phone calls, worrying, looking for lost grocery lists, telling them to take the $17 out of my pay check (which they didn't, as it would have been the final straw that made me quit) they ended up laughing and making jokes about the whole situation two days later when I came back to work. Annoying Bananas!

On my most recent trip to Trader Joes, I did my usual rounds picking out some of my favorites (bananas included) while at the same time being cautious not to buy too much...as holiday shopping has put a slight dent in my wallet. Satisfied with my choices, I stand in the always too long line and wait patiently for my cashier. As I'm being rung up, the check out girl is chatting away with me, the way only Trader Joes cashiers are paid to be (note: that cute cashier guy is not flirting with you, he's just paid to seem like he's flirting with you), the total appears...Holy crap, I spent that much! I walk away with my purchases, a little pissed and annoyed I spent so much money on my groceries.

On closer inspection of my receipt when I get home, I notice a huge charge....my order was not rung up as 5 but instead 56 BANANAS!!! Of course I head back over there a bit later and cut the line to get my $20 back, and sarcastically laugh as the cashier tries to tell me I can go grab 51 more bananas if I want. Why are bananas trying to suck my dry?

I love you bananas, stop being so cruel! Thank You.

photo credit

My Super Duper Ginormous Love for ETSY.com

Its safe to say the I am addicted to ETSY.com and if you are getting a gift from me this holiday season, it came from Etsy.

Eeeeetsssyyy eeeetsy eeetsy etsy...yeah I talk about etsy alot (even more than I talk about my newest addiction to Crunch...and you can ask my roommates, I talk about Crunch a lot! Hey Carl, love you in Retro-robics!) Ok, now that that is out my my system...

Etsy has such an awesome search engine and gift guide and price ranges, and its all about supporting the little guys out there, just trying to make it one craft at a time. My biggest problem with shopping on etsy is I want everything for myself...eep no good...but hey it is my birthday month, so I did buy myself a little something something...

Some awesome gift ideas I came across in my search:

Recycled Strand Scarf $19

SOLO Floor Lamp $190

Mixed Media Prints on Wood $28

Autum Girl Frame Set $22

Piggy Goes to Market Tote $20

I found a lot of other really awesome things too...but I can't show them on here now, otherwise a few of my readers might not be too surprised when they get their gifts...

Small Steps to De-Hoarding & Making $$$

Ok, so maybe $$$ is a little too much, as I didn't really rake in the money with this one...but I highly suggest this for anyone with old CDs lying around the house.

BuyBackMedia.com will buy your old CDs, DVDs and Games for cash money! The catch is that you have to have the cases for all of them and they have to be in pristine condition...they charge you to ship CDs they don't want or are not in good quality back to you, or they will just simply throw them away if you request that as well.

Not knowing if this was real or a scam, I chose to send about 13 or so CDs to them (free shipping when sending at least 12 at a time). I also opted to have them throw away any bad condition CDs. I sent them off and then not more than 2 weeks later a check for $25!! Not a lot of money but super awesome for a pile of CDs just collecting dust in my room.

Scam the Man

While home for the holidays, I went out shopping with my mom (the original cheap ass bitch, love you!) and went into Bare Escentuals. I love this make-up! As my mom is buying some stuff, the lady at the store starts sampling new blush colors for me, I fell in love with the color Tulip (scary color in person, but very light and fresh on the face...I sound like the sales lady...). But as its the holiday season (meaning very low on my priority list of what to spend money on), I opt out of buying the blush...but she gives me a free sample...however sample is not the word, more like a 2 month supply of the stuff! Hello sales lady, I'll see you in 2 months for another free sample!



Also for those not as cheap as me, but still cheap can go to BareEsentuals.com and enter code FRIENDS to get 20% off from Dec 3rd-6th